Cape Town - Highlanders scrumhalf Aaron Smith believes he should have taken time off from rugby after being suspended for an off-field indiscretion in 2016.
The 28-year-old was seen entering a disabled toilet cubicle
at Christchurch Airport in September with an unidentified woman who was not his
partner and was subsequently sent home ahead of the All Blacks' Test against
the Springboks in Durban last year.
"It was a huge mistake by me, obviously," Smith
told media on Monday as he prepared for his 100th Super Rugby match for the
Highlanders against the Rebels on Friday.
It's the first time he has spoken about the incident since a tearful public apology immediately afterwards.
"The way it hurt my family and my partner, and then
myself obviously, it was just a really tough time," said Smith.
"I probably should have put rugby on the backburner then and focused on myself and my family.
"But we're past that and I've learnt a lot from it - I
think a lot of positives have come from that incident for me personally, on
field and off field."
NZ Rugby concluded that Smith's actions amounted to serious
misconduct, and gave him a formal warning.
Smith said the on-going effects from the incident had been
difficult to shake off but he'd undertaken counselling, and had rediscovered
his love for rugby after struggling through the All Blacks' end-of-year tour.
"I got to the point where I was over rugby for the
year," he added.
"But at Christmas I was already excited to play -
usually you need that whole two months to want to come back.
"I fixed a lot of things mentally off the field and that cleared me up to train really hard in the off-season.
"I'm in a really good place right now and I'm just loving how I am on the field and off the field, and how life is."