Let me put it differently for those who feel a little lost in the admittedly “esoteric” talk of happiness within:

It seems reasonable to state that whenever we feel as though life has to be a certain way so we can be happy, we will suffer. Those include all the times we desperately crave something good (and cling to it when we have it) or angrily push away something bad (and hope keep it away). Basically, anytime we find ourselves saying “If only...”

Fill in the blanks and you’ll see what I mean.

If only it were Friday…
If only I had more money…
If only my team would win…

Our sense of wellbeing shouldn’t depend on outside factors because that’s guaranteed to make us miserable. In the first example, we’ll desperately crave the weekend, cling to every moment of it, and then be depressed or angry (or both) when Monday comes. Instead, we should enjoy the weekends (or anything else that’s good in our lives) while realising they won’t last and that "Mondays" will come around.

I don't think this is being negative; it's just realistic. It also makes us more appreciate of the good things that happen to us (because we know they won't last) and leaves us prepared to face whatever bad things are bound to happen when the good times end. Basically, the solution is to simply learn to be happy with life as it is.

We can feel good for good things and feel bad for bad things without getting entangled. So instead of feeling patriotic when we win and getting depressed when we lose, we simply love our country regardless. That way, we’re able to wave our flags all the time instead of taking them off our cars (as a lot of people are already doing) the minute we aren’t on top anymore.

Who’s with me?

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